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Who Before How

tangible techniques Jul 09, 2022

Have you gotten advice lately that you know you “should” take, but you just don’t?

Me too.

But why? Why do our brains love to ignore great advice? I love hearing from experts and learning and growing. And experts often have great advice (I mean, “Don’t touch that hot stove!” – that’s some great advice). And then I ignore it (except for the stove part). But how many times have you heard (or even solicited) great advice and never followed through?


I just got some great advice yesterday about my business…and then I said to myself, “Ugh, that is so much work and I just DON’T want to.”


That’s the thing about great advice, especially from someone you trust, it usually pushes us out of our comfort zone. And as soon as any human brain finds itself out of its comfort zone: RESISTANCE. Totally normal resistance, but, resistance, nonetheless.


Here’s what I think. First, I need to believe in myself. My ability to make great decisions, and do the right things, for my business and my family, and my vision of what I’m creating. It’s called, “Being the WHO.” I need to be THE WHO – of my life, my business. THEN ask  “HOW?” Asking for advice is all about asking how. How do I do this? How do I say that? How, how, how…. But, if I am not secure in the who, then, the how from someone else will seem scary or inapplicable or, my favorite, oh so stupid.  


So here is my advice: Get clear on you. What are your dreams? What are your beliefs? How would you like to think and feel? Write it out. Make a vision board. Whatever it takes to be the protagonist in your own story. Then ask about how from a deep desire to TWEAK it all just a tad, to move you one inch closer to the goal. Asking how from a place of, “I need to CHANGE EVERYTHING” just makes your brain run for the hills. 


Be the WHO and the HOW will be exactly what you need right now. 


I can help you solidify the who. I’m a Stress Management Coach and I offer 1:1 coaching for physical therapists and other people in health care who want to love their life, jobs, and career again. If you’ve been thinking, “I just don’t know HOW!”  I can help you BE the WHO, so the HOW will become oh so very clear. 


“C’mon tell me…who are you?”
– The WHO


Want to know more about what I do? Try my new course,

"Stress and Overwhelm: Causes, Cures and Coping."

In it you will find neuroscience, practices and my signature sense of humor. All at your fingertips in the Kajabi app.



I also offer 1:1 coaching for physical therapists and other people in health care who want to love their life, jobs and career again. If you’ve been thinking, “All I need is a new job, new career, new something and I’ll feel better”… I can help you feel better right now, right HERE. 


Click the link to book a free 45 minute stress-assessment call and get started on your unique plan. 




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