New Year... SAME YOU!!Jan 19, 2023
Happy January!! I know, I know…I’m late to the party! Are you sick of all the, “New Year, New You” nonsense? Good, because here’s the thing: The “old” you, the actual you, THIS YOU, is already perfect. THIS YOU is complete and exactly where you are supposed to be. Who made these rules that a new year REQUIRES new goals?
I rarely set goals in January. Why? Because my goals are ongoing and beat to their own drum. My timeline is mine BUT the universe…she seems to have her OWN timeline (hence my children are 4.5 years apart, not 3 like I thought I wanted 😊).
And here’s the rub…any goal I set, was MADE UP by ME, as was the TIMELINE. Which means there is no such thing as a goal not met. It hasn’t been met YET. My future self is not going to count how far BEHIND I am on a goal that I made up!
What I do instead is pick a word. My word for 2023 is BALANCE. It was hard for me to choose what I refer to as a bland word. Blah. Balance. My word last year was ABUNDANT with a side of DAUNTLESS. I need a word that is powerful, future driven, ambitious. LET’S GO!!
Here is what I’ve realized over the past month or so…I do not have enough fun. My life revolves around work and this business. Fun fits in the cracks. Fun fits in the spaces between work. Sometimes, I have so many tasks on my list, I go days without fun.
I’ve had it.
I get to have fun. I get to work less and play more. I get to “have it all” – a great job, hilarious kids, meaningful relationships, and a business I enjoy. What I don’t NEED to be is: stressed out, overwhelmed, and burnt out. And, let me tell you, I was headed that way by the end of 2022. Ironic right? The stress management coach headed for burn out.
I meant to take two weeks off and get back at it around January 2nd or 3rd. Notice it’s the 19th.
I just did NOT have it in me to work. I had no content to write. My fingers wanted to knit not type. My brain wanted to Netflix not think (New season of The Crown people!!).
In the past, I would have gotten more stressed that I wasn’t working. Or, even better, I would have MADE myself.
JUST. DO. IT.
Here’s what I did instead. If you are headed towards burn out or just plain fed up, try this to see if it helps:
- I allowed ALL the feelings. Stress. Anxiety. Fear of failure. Frustration. Skepticism. Insecurity. You name it. I allowed it. What does that mean? Allowing a feeling? Check out my YouTube video on allowing and processing a feeling for a better understanding:
- I honored my desire. I had a desire to KNITFLIX…that’s a word my friends. You KNIT while watching re-runs on Netflix. Re-runs are best for knitting. Why? Shoot me an email and I’ll tell ya.
- While honoring my desire, I noticed guilt and DECIDED that guilt is a THOUGHT ERROR. I let it run through me and moved on. Kept knitting. Kept asking myself, “Want to post?” “Want to write?” When the answer was NO, I didn’t.
- I honored commitments that were already scheduled. My ability to show up told me I was NOT in BURN OUT. I was able to deliver scheduled workshops and coach my clients. I got coached and participated in my mastermind group. Honoring these commitments reminded me of my own sufficiency. My ability to BALANCE my life.
- I enjoyed the heck out of the holidays with my family. I let go of expectations and observed. I found humor where I might otherwise have found exasperation. I ate too much, especially sugar, and let that be OK.
I feel rested and ready now. I feel hopeful and energetic now. I’m eating better. Sleeping better. Writing again.
So, next time you are feeling overwhelmed and you KNOW you need a break:
- ALLOW all the feelings
- HONOR your desires
- NOTICE guilt or shame or anything else that comes while you are resting. LET IT GO
- HONOR commitments (but don’t schedule more!)
For many of us rest is not natural, normal or needed (HA!! WE ALL NEED REST!!)). Rest feels indulgent and unnecessary. I’m here to tell you: REST is an essential part of LIFE. You get to have fun. You get to play. You get to enjoy your work. BALANCE.
So…for today, my New Year’s Blog is 19 days after New Year’s. But it’s not late. It’s right on time. My time.
Can’t seem to find that balance. Let me help you identify what’s in the GAP. Then we chip away one by one at the thoughts that hold you back. Book a free call with me.
Want to know more about what I do? Try my new course,
"Stress and Overwhelm: Causes, Cures and Coping."
In it you will find neuroscience, practices and my signature sense of humor. All at your fingertips in the Kajabi app.
I also offer 1:1 coaching for physical therapists and other people in health care who want to love their life, jobs and career again. If you’ve been thinking, “All I need is a new job, new career, new something and I’ll feel better”… I can help you feel better right now, right HERE.
Click the link to book a free 45 minute stress-assessment call and get started on your unique plan.
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